MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! :)
9 years ago
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Simple Pleasures
Sometimes, I don't like work. But then there are those people in your life who make it worth it. 2 coworkers of mine, Nate and Jonathan, are such people. This picture makes me laugh all the time (they can pull off the big heart can't they? Not to mention particularly small Santa hats!)
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Grateful :)
I just have to take a minute and say how grateful I am to be a daughter of a loving Heavenly Father. I'm reminded everyday just how good He is to me and how I have so much to be grateful for.
This week has been a stressful one. I was certain that if my hair hadn't fallen out by the end, it would certainly be full of grey ones! But, like always, I'm reminded of how blessed I am.
Remember when I bought a truck way back when? Well as much as I love Roy (yes, that is his name) he has given me a run for my money and lately has been such a headache. Seeing as I bought him in October of last year, I thought that's when the registration would be up, well I was wrong. I received an email this last Saturday (Sept. 22) that this was my final notice (when did I get the first one?!) of registration due at the end of the month AND an emissions test was required. I should also mention I am scheduled to leave town the 27th and wouldn't be back until October 1 so I had to get it done before I left. SHOOT!!
I was recruited to be a chaperone at my niece and nephew's birthday party, but with the help of family, was able to go get the truck tested that day. It FAILED. I was close to devastation. LUCKILY, the areas that failed had nothing to do with the carburetor or the engine. I needed 2 new fuel caps and the fuel hose to be replaced. As I was driving home after the emissions test, my stepdad was already on the phone calling his friend, Jeff, who is our family mechanic. Luckily he had time in his schedule to work on the truck Tuesday. Monday was spent racing to the different AutoZones trying to find the right parts and getting the truck to Jeff. My mom and I were able to drop it off successfully Monday night, he worked on the next day and we picked it up that night.
Now amidst all this, I received a phone call Monday afternoon while I was at work from CGCC looking to set-up an interview for an available position as a math tutor. I had applied for the job back in July and since I never heard back, I had long given up on it. I was eager for the opportunity but worried again because I was leaving Thursday. I called back first thing Tuesday morning and left a message and then went into the temple.
Side note: Don't you just love the temple? I mean really, how can you not? :) I'm so grateful that I have the opportunity to go every week :)
This week has been a stressful one. I was certain that if my hair hadn't fallen out by the end, it would certainly be full of grey ones! But, like always, I'm reminded of how blessed I am.
Remember when I bought a truck way back when? Well as much as I love Roy (yes, that is his name) he has given me a run for my money and lately has been such a headache. Seeing as I bought him in October of last year, I thought that's when the registration would be up, well I was wrong. I received an email this last Saturday (Sept. 22) that this was my final notice (when did I get the first one?!) of registration due at the end of the month AND an emissions test was required. I should also mention I am scheduled to leave town the 27th and wouldn't be back until October 1 so I had to get it done before I left. SHOOT!!
I was recruited to be a chaperone at my niece and nephew's birthday party, but with the help of family, was able to go get the truck tested that day. It FAILED. I was close to devastation. LUCKILY, the areas that failed had nothing to do with the carburetor or the engine. I needed 2 new fuel caps and the fuel hose to be replaced. As I was driving home after the emissions test, my stepdad was already on the phone calling his friend, Jeff, who is our family mechanic. Luckily he had time in his schedule to work on the truck Tuesday. Monday was spent racing to the different AutoZones trying to find the right parts and getting the truck to Jeff. My mom and I were able to drop it off successfully Monday night, he worked on the next day and we picked it up that night.
Now amidst all this, I received a phone call Monday afternoon while I was at work from CGCC looking to set-up an interview for an available position as a math tutor. I had applied for the job back in July and since I never heard back, I had long given up on it. I was eager for the opportunity but worried again because I was leaving Thursday. I called back first thing Tuesday morning and left a message and then went into the temple.
Side note: Don't you just love the temple? I mean really, how can you not? :) I'm so grateful that I have the opportunity to go every week :)
Anyways, when I got out of the temple, I had a message from CGCC asking me to call back to set up an appt for Wednesday. I was grateful but worried about time. I needed to take the truck back at some time, do this interview, work, pack, and I've been babysitting my friend's little brother 2 days a week which also would take place Wednesday but I felt peace and so the interview was set for 9am.
Wednesday was crazy busy but AMAZING. I woke up at 5am (nearly impossible for me -- it did help I went to bed at 10pm the night before), showered, read, and headed out. I went and got rubbing alcohol to put in the gas tank (old trick), ran to WalMart, the bank, and then was 10 mins early before the Emissions Testing opened.
There were 5 cars in front of me, 3 in one lane, so I got behind the other 2 in a separate lane. Right before 8, a worker had the 2 cars in front of me move to another lane (tender mercy #1) so I was now the first in line! The truck PASSED and I was gone within 20 mins (tender mercies #2 and #3) and I arrived to my interview early (tender mercy #4) and had the interview. It went ok, but I was uncertain. I made it to my friends house to watch her brother just in time for her to leave at 10:15 (tender mercy #5) and I was with him until 2:45 in which time I was able to register the truck without any late fees (tender mercy #6) and I heard that I got the job (tender mercy #7) and was able to fill out the paperwork the next day before I leave town (tender mercy #8) then I headed to work which I made with 5 mins to spare (tender mercy #9). I made it home and found out some pills I ordered arrived finally (tender mercy #10) and I was able to pack and get to bed by a reasonable hour (tender mercy #11).
Thursday (today) hasn't been nearly as hectic but I've taken Kevin to work, gone back to CGCC and completed all the paperwork necessary for employment, ran some errands for the trip, finished packing, and have a little time before I go to work. I only have to work for a few hours today because of our trip. I can't believe we made it through this week but I know it is because I've had divine help. Now we all can enjoy our trip this weekend!
Speaking of, in just a matter of hours, my mom, stepdad, brother and I will be in San Francisco!! I can't believe the trip is finally here! And I'm glad that things are taken care of at home so we can really relax and have fun this weekend. Like going to Ghirardelli Square
and eating the best bread ever!
It's going to be a GREAT weekend!! We get back Monday night and then I have the week to watch my niece and nephew while they're on fall break (tender mercy #12) before I start work Monday, October 8 (tender mercy #13). Not to mention General Conference is next weekend!!! (tender mercy #14).
Life is great. I have so much to be grateful for! :)
Monday, August 20, 2012
Actuarial Exam 1
This is the 4th post I've done today, so please be sure to read them all! (The first one is titled "Day 11").
So want to hear something cool (well for me)? I'm registered to take the first Actuarial Exam (1/P - Probability) on Thursday, November 15, in Casa Grande! It's less than 3 months away...ahhh! I don't think I'm nowhere near ready but at least I still have some time...
Truth be told, I don't expect to pass this time due to lack of time, effort, and preparation on my part these past 3 months. I'm registered for this online seminar to help prepare and it expires on November 16, but if you take the test in the first 6-months and don't pass, they will extend your subscription 6 more months for fee. It's cheaper for me to take the test, fail, and have the class extended rather than buy the class again for full price.
But who knows, miracles happen. I'm going to be as dedicated as I can these upcoming days and maybe, just maybe, I will pass in November. My birthday is that month, that would be some birthday present!! But still, please send me good thoughts. Happy studying! :)
So want to hear something cool (well for me)? I'm registered to take the first Actuarial Exam (1/P - Probability) on Thursday, November 15, in Casa Grande! It's less than 3 months away...ahhh! I don't think I'm nowhere near ready but at least I still have some time...
Truth be told, I don't expect to pass this time due to lack of time, effort, and preparation on my part these past 3 months. I'm registered for this online seminar to help prepare and it expires on November 16, but if you take the test in the first 6-months and don't pass, they will extend your subscription 6 more months for fee. It's cheaper for me to take the test, fail, and have the class extended rather than buy the class again for full price.
But who knows, miracles happen. I'm going to be as dedicated as I can these upcoming days and maybe, just maybe, I will pass in November. My birthday is that month, that would be some birthday present!! But still, please send me good thoughts. Happy studying! :)
Day 13
Describe 5 Weaknesses You Have:
1. Talking to People. This definitely isn't a strength of mine. I'm a quiet person. I have trouble going up to people, especially those I don't know, and start talking. I wish I was better at this. I'm jealous of those people who have the skill of talking to anyone and everyone, and can make friends so easily.
2. Sleeping. I love to sleep. I'm really good at it, LOL. I can sleep up to 10+ hours a night, and it still doesn't feel like enough, even when I add a good, long nap in the day. It's a hard thing to break...
3. Curiosity. Haha perhaps being nosy is a better way to put it. I like to know what goes on in just about any facet of life, in anyone's life for that matter. It can be hard for me to sit back, allowing others to let me know what they want me to know about them.
4. Diet. I'm terrible at eating healthy and regularly. I love food, but I don't eat a lot. Even when I'm hungry, sometimes I'd prefer to go without the food, then actually prepare something. When I actually do it, it's not healthy. Usually candy and junk food, or without the proper fruits and veggies.
5. Mental Control. I've never been the best at keeping my mind from wandering, especially at not-so-appropriate times. I can be really hard on myself and others. I'm working on being better for accepting everyone as they are, myself included.
Day 12
Describe a typical day in your life.
Well... I'm currently in a transition right now. I was being support lax through the day and hardly being productive at all. Well starting last week I am trying to stick to my new routine/schedule I've set for myself. It hasn't been the easiest to follow, but I'm trying. I'll talk of the latter:
* I wake up around 6am where I will read for 50 mins: 15 mins from the Old Testament (It's my goal to read the whole thing, less than 300 pages left!), 15 mins from the Book of Mormon, and 20 mins from a church book. (Currently I'm reading Jesus the Christ and it's SOOOO good! I recommend it to any Christian. Less than 100 pages left!)
* I then begin a load of laundry
* I make lunch for my mom and myself
* I do the dishes from the night before
* Finish the laundry
* Exercise for an hour (usually 2 miles on the treadmill and the rest jumping on our small trampoline)
* Shower
* By this time it's about 10am and I begin studying for my actuarial test
* At noon I take a 30-minute lunch break
* Study for another 2 hours
* I will head to work as a part-time math tutor until I get off just after 7pm
* I go home and eat dinner, watch a few shows on TV and by 9:30pm I'm exhausted and usually head to bed by 10 or 11.
It varies some when my mom sends me on errands, Tuesdays I go to the temple, and Thursdays I do the "Saturday chores." Weekends I don't study at all but tend to the house, work, and hang out.
Well... I'm currently in a transition right now. I was being support lax through the day and hardly being productive at all. Well starting last week I am trying to stick to my new routine/schedule I've set for myself. It hasn't been the easiest to follow, but I'm trying. I'll talk of the latter:
* I wake up around 6am where I will read for 50 mins: 15 mins from the Old Testament (It's my goal to read the whole thing, less than 300 pages left!), 15 mins from the Book of Mormon, and 20 mins from a church book. (Currently I'm reading Jesus the Christ and it's SOOOO good! I recommend it to any Christian. Less than 100 pages left!)
* I then begin a load of laundry
* I make lunch for my mom and myself
* I do the dishes from the night before
* Finish the laundry
* Exercise for an hour (usually 2 miles on the treadmill and the rest jumping on our small trampoline)
* Shower
* By this time it's about 10am and I begin studying for my actuarial test
* At noon I take a 30-minute lunch break
* Study for another 2 hours
* I will head to work as a part-time math tutor until I get off just after 7pm
* I go home and eat dinner, watch a few shows on TV and by 9:30pm I'm exhausted and usually head to bed by 10 or 11.
It varies some when my mom sends me on errands, Tuesdays I go to the temple, and Thursdays I do the "Saturday chores." Weekends I don't study at all but tend to the house, work, and hang out.
Day 11
Describe 10 Pet Peeves you have:
Hmm... haha I have a lot.
1. I think my biggest pet peeve is when you're going somewhere and you walk past someone and they say, "Hey! How are you doing?" but they keep walking and clearly have no intention to stop, chat, and listen to what you have to say. Saying something like, "Hey! It's good to see you. Have a great day!" is completely acceptable :)
2. I can't stand it when people smack/chew with their mouth open.
3. The sound of silverware clanking against dishes (i.e. a spoon against a bowl).
4. When people drive without utilizing their blinker.
5. Short notice.
6. Not having a plan. I can go with the flow to an extent, but I need an idea of what's ahead.
7. When people talk around me when I'm trying to listen, particularly at the temple and at church. I'm sorry but the Celestial Room is not the place to discuss where you're going to go to lunch.
8. When guys don't act like gentleman.
9. When people honk the horn at me, trying to be funny. It's NOT.
10. Family members trying to touch my chin just because they know I don't like it.
Hmm... haha I have a lot.
1. I think my biggest pet peeve is when you're going somewhere and you walk past someone and they say, "Hey! How are you doing?" but they keep walking and clearly have no intention to stop, chat, and listen to what you have to say. Saying something like, "Hey! It's good to see you. Have a great day!" is completely acceptable :)
2. I can't stand it when people smack/chew with their mouth open.
3. The sound of silverware clanking against dishes (i.e. a spoon against a bowl).
4. When people drive without utilizing their blinker.
5. Short notice.
6. Not having a plan. I can go with the flow to an extent, but I need an idea of what's ahead.
7. When people talk around me when I'm trying to listen, particularly at the temple and at church. I'm sorry but the Celestial Room is not the place to discuss where you're going to go to lunch.
8. When guys don't act like gentleman.
9. When people honk the horn at me, trying to be funny. It's NOT.
10. Family members trying to touch my chin just because they know I don't like it.
Saturday, July 28, 2012
Another anniversary...
Hola :)
So, I've debated blogging about this because it's so personal but truth be told, I don't think a lot of people read this blog and I semi-use it as a journal so I'll give it a whirl anyway...
Yesterday, July 27, 2012 was the year-mark of when I went into the MTC. I had been dreading this day for awhile and as it got closer, I kept getting more and more anxious, but what are you going to do? It's not like you can skip right to the 28th (as nice as that would be) but the significance of the day would still be there. But as the day came, felt a little too long, but eventually passed and I survived :) Luckily, my mom had a half-day at work and was done by noon so we had a good time shopping at Savers and other stores and eating some Jamba, etc. It's become quite the tradition between to the two of us and I LOVE IT.
Not many people knew what the day held (I don't even think everyone in my family knew) probably due to the excitement of the Olympics/Opening Ceremonies and the other daily life activities that we find ourselves absorbed in. I did post the following as my Facebook status:
"Life is really good at throwing curve balls, you just never fully know what to expect. Had you asked me a year ago today where I thought I'd be in a year, I would've answered approximately 2,380 [I Googled it] miles from here... Congratulations MTC District 38-C on your year mark!!! :)"
As a result, I received the sweetest text from a friend, "Saw your status. Just wanted you to know I am thinking of you. God does have plans for us and I know that someday in this life or next it will make more sense." It was just what I need to hear and from her especially, for she has been through her fair share of trials and heartache, particularly as of late. I'm so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who makes Himself and His love known to me daily, making it impossible to forget that He is always there, loves me, and ready to bless me.
I figured it would be fitting to post a few extra photos from the MTC (I still have yet to post them all...) It was a short amount of time, definitely a hard time, but a great time that I'm so grateful I had. I wish it was for longer, but I have no regrets. The church is true. God is real. Jesus Christ is my Savior. I love them all :)
So, I've debated blogging about this because it's so personal but truth be told, I don't think a lot of people read this blog and I semi-use it as a journal so I'll give it a whirl anyway...
Yesterday, July 27, 2012 was the year-mark of when I went into the MTC. I had been dreading this day for awhile and as it got closer, I kept getting more and more anxious, but what are you going to do? It's not like you can skip right to the 28th (as nice as that would be) but the significance of the day would still be there. But as the day came, felt a little too long, but eventually passed and I survived :) Luckily, my mom had a half-day at work and was done by noon so we had a good time shopping at Savers and other stores and eating some Jamba, etc. It's become quite the tradition between to the two of us and I LOVE IT.
Not many people knew what the day held (I don't even think everyone in my family knew) probably due to the excitement of the Olympics/Opening Ceremonies and the other daily life activities that we find ourselves absorbed in. I did post the following as my Facebook status:
"Life is really good at throwing curve balls, you just never fully know what to expect. Had you asked me a year ago today where I thought I'd be in a year, I would've answered approximately 2,380 [I Googled it] miles from here... Congratulations MTC District 38-C on your year mark!!! :)"
As a result, I received the sweetest text from a friend, "Saw your status. Just wanted you to know I am thinking of you. God does have plans for us and I know that someday in this life or next it will make more sense." It was just what I need to hear and from her especially, for she has been through her fair share of trials and heartache, particularly as of late. I'm so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who makes Himself and His love known to me daily, making it impossible to forget that He is always there, loves me, and ready to bless me.
I figured it would be fitting to post a few extra photos from the MTC (I still have yet to post them all...) It was a short amount of time, definitely a hard time, but a great time that I'm so grateful I had. I wish it was for longer, but I have no regrets. The church is true. God is real. Jesus Christ is my Savior. I love them all :)
Me with my companions (currently serving in Albuquerque) and our friend "Minerva" (serving in Chicago)
My district (there were more but some went home and others went to other MTCs after 3 weeks) with our teacher Hermano Stevens
All the girls in my district (others serving in Arcadia, CA and Costa Rica)
"Stretchy Bands!" Haha you can't expect us to always exercise ;)
My Aunt Connie and I :) She and Dale are serving in LA
Krysta, my friend from college. She's serving in Fiji
Serving around the world
My district with more elders (they went to the Dominican Republic)
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Happy Anniversary!
Wow been awhile...my bad...I need to get in a better routine/schedule with this blog (I'm a HUGE believer in routines!). Not much to report on (haha well that's a lie but just one thing I have in mind right now...)
I graduated college a year ago today! Can you believe it?! That's crazy! ONE WHOLE YEAR being done with homework, tests, projects, all-nighters, group presentations, etc. etc. and it feels SO great!! Don't get me wrong. I miss it at times. A LOT actually. Not so much the school part but the aspects that are attached, like living on my own, having roommates, social gatherings, etc. I don't always miss the roommates but I do a lot because my house gets to be so quiet and it was like instant-friends and social life without having to try too much. Sure they were also instant-trials and patience builders but those are good to have at times.
Here's a picture of me the night of graduation:
July 22, 2011
And here's a picture I had my mom take of me today:
July 22, 2012
What a whirlwind of a year it's been! Throughout the year I found myself complaining mostly about my Bachelor's Degree because it didn't pay off as soon as I would've hoped. I work part-time as a math tutor where high school students have the same job. HOWEVER, I'm always reminded how incredibly blessed I am to have a formal college education. It has opened doors that otherwise would've remained shut (and I know this will continue to be the case) had I not received as my brother puts it, "That piece of paper that says I'm smart."
I love to learn. I hope this desire only continues to grow. I'm so grateful for the opportunity I had (and now have) to further my education and hopefully use that to better others' lives. With that I just want to end with my motto for my life/daily advice: "Learn something new everyday -- no matter who the teacher is. Then to have balance, teach someone everyday -- no matter who the student is."
I LOVE LEARNING!!!
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Day 10
Describe Your Most Embarrassing Moment
I am going to be VERY vague about this because it was very humiliating. Only my brother, Scott, and my sister-in-law, Becky, know about it because unfortunately they were with me, but at least it was them and someone who isn't family... It happened last year one evening when we were driving to their house after eating dinner at Benihana. And that's all I'm going to say. :)
I am going to be VERY vague about this because it was very humiliating. Only my brother, Scott, and my sister-in-law, Becky, know about it because unfortunately they were with me, but at least it was them and someone who isn't family... It happened last year one evening when we were driving to their house after eating dinner at Benihana. And that's all I'm going to say. :)
Day 9
List 10 People Who Have Influenced You and Describe How
1. My mom - Raising me (that alone encompasses so many levels)
2. My dad - instilling in me a mathematical brain and love for learning
3. Rick Hirschi (econ professor at BYUI) - taught me how to be open-minded
4. Greg Cramer (one of my bishops at BYUI) - helped me prepare for temple, mission, and life
5. My brother, Scott - helps put things into perspective and aids me in becoming a "Doctrinal Beastess"
6. My old roommate, Rachel - the best example I know of one who forgives
7. My brother, Brian - the very definition of a hard-worker
8. Hermanas Wagner and Henderson (MTC companions) - great examples of selflessness, love, patience, kindness, and sensitivity to others
9. My good friend, Hannah - one who is always happy, calm, and doesn't sweat the small stuff
10. My Savior - My best friend, He really is ALWAYS there!
Day 8
What are 5 passions you have?
1. Learning
I love to learn!! It doesn't matter what it's about either. I love learning new things and increasing my knowledge and understanding about a variety of topics. I want to be one of those old people who have spent their life in study and are their own personal library and knows just about everything on anything!
2. Sleep
I love to sleep. I'm not a morning or a night person, I'm a sleeping person. Enough said.
3. Travel
I wish I could be a professional traveler. How awesome would that be?! Being paid to travel the world and seeing so many sites would be AWESOME!
4. Routines
Sounds weird, but I'm a huge believer in having a routine. Some people would call this a rut, but I call it stability. Plus there is such power and strength in it; I know this from experience :)
5. Gospel of Jesus Christ
Learning about this consumes me. Everything I do is because of what I know and believe. There is no end to how much I love the Gospel!
1. Learning
I love to learn!! It doesn't matter what it's about either. I love learning new things and increasing my knowledge and understanding about a variety of topics. I want to be one of those old people who have spent their life in study and are their own personal library and knows just about everything on anything!
2. Sleep
I love to sleep. I'm not a morning or a night person, I'm a sleeping person. Enough said.
3. Travel
I wish I could be a professional traveler. How awesome would that be?! Being paid to travel the world and seeing so many sites would be AWESOME!
4. Routines
Sounds weird, but I'm a huge believer in having a routine. Some people would call this a rut, but I call it stability. Plus there is such power and strength in it; I know this from experience :)
5. Gospel of Jesus Christ
Learning about this consumes me. Everything I do is because of what I know and believe. There is no end to how much I love the Gospel!
Day 7
What is your dream job and why?
My dream job is actually to have a lack thereof. I would love to be a stay-at-home wife and mother rather than be in Corporate America with a formal job title. The work that goes on in the home I would love to do. However, that hasn't happened yet so I'll have to go to Plan B until then.
Plan B would be a low-key job, enough to make end's meet, but nothing lavish. I don't really want to be a hard-core career woman, but a good, loyal, hard-working employee. I would really love to use my math in some setting. Basically, I want to be that nerd in the corner who's crunching numbers. Right now I'm preparing to take the first Actuarial Exam (which I need to be a lot better about it) but I think that will be a good fit for me, at least I hope so :)
My dream job is actually to have a lack thereof. I would love to be a stay-at-home wife and mother rather than be in Corporate America with a formal job title. The work that goes on in the home I would love to do. However, that hasn't happened yet so I'll have to go to Plan B until then.
Plan B would be a low-key job, enough to make end's meet, but nothing lavish. I don't really want to be a hard-core career woman, but a good, loyal, hard-working employee. I would really love to use my math in some setting. Basically, I want to be that nerd in the corner who's crunching numbers. Right now I'm preparing to take the first Actuarial Exam (which I need to be a lot better about it) but I think that will be a good fit for me, at least I hope so :)
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Day 6
What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced?
This is a toughy...we all have our fair share of trials, struggles, and heartaches. For me 2 things come to mind but I'll choose the most recent one since it's most fresh and feels like the hardest right now; this would have to be being sent home from my mission early.
I was never sure about serving a mission. I was never one of those girls who knew they absolutely wanted to nor one of the girls who knew absolutely that it wasn't for them either. I was always on the fence and when the time for a decision arrived, I struggled greatly and was so overly-concerned that I would choose wrong. At first I decided no, and for a couple months I felt uneasy about it so I went to talk to my bishop and that same night we started my papers. Before I knew it, a month had passed and all my paperwork was done but I still had 3 months until I could actually submit my papers to Salt Lake. The whole time I was still never fully committed but then all of a sudden I had my mission call, I knew where I was going, when I was going, and needed to learn a language. But that piece of paper changed it all for me. My mission was all I could think about, and though terrified as I was, I couldn't wait to get out there and then before I knew it I was in the MTC.
I enjoyed the MTC but the first couple of days was a difficult transition for me. Everyone around me was saying it wasn't hard for them at all (the transition) and in my head I was like, "Are you kidding me?! This is sooo hard!" But as I got accustomed to everything, started understanding some Spanish, I was content and with each passing day couldn't wait to get to New Jersey. But things went south. I don't want to go in to detail on here why I was sent home, so I won't, but the jist is I started getting sick and it just got worse and worse as time went on that leaders were beginning to be concerned.
I was so afraid to be sent home, because I knew, deep down, if I was, I wouldn't return to the mission field, despite how much I would want to, for it wasn't my will to be done. I was informed on Wednesday, September 7, that the MTC Presidency would discuss my case and make a decision about what to do. I found out the next day in the afternoon that I would be sent home and then the following morning I was on the plane to Arizona. It all happened so fast, no way to soften the blow.
I can't explain the hurt, disappointment, and grief that I felt when I came home, especially in those first days. All I wanted to do was cry, and the only thing that would comfort me the slightest was laying my head on my mom's lap with her massaging my head/playing with my hair. I would just cry and she would cry too, but it was comforting. It brought whole new meaning to the counsel, "Mourn with those that mourn." That first day, weekend, week, and month home were the longest of my life. Time still feels slow but It's surprising to see that I've been home now for 8 1/2 months.
It has gotten better, immensely, but it's still hard. I still yearn to be in New Jersey, struggling with Spanish, and a companion, etc. etc. but it would all be worth it. I just know it. I don't cry as much anymore but there still are days when I need my mom's comfort. The hardest thing about it all now is seeing all these people serve missions. I count nearly almost 25 people (friends/acquaintances) that I know personally either on a mission or just about to go, and nearly half of them are girls. I'm incredibly happy for them but every time it's like salt in an open wound. As time goes on, the sting becomes less, but there is no escape from the memory. For the rest of my life, every time the topic of missionary work comes up, when someone receives a call, has a farewell, or homecoming, my mind will revert to my mission and how it was cut short (at least to me, the Lord knew 6 weeks was what I would get). But luckily for me, through Jesus Christ, the sting will not come each time, for my hurt and grief will be swallowed up in the Atonement of Jesus Christ. And that is the best of all :)
This is a toughy...we all have our fair share of trials, struggles, and heartaches. For me 2 things come to mind but I'll choose the most recent one since it's most fresh and feels like the hardest right now; this would have to be being sent home from my mission early.
I was never sure about serving a mission. I was never one of those girls who knew they absolutely wanted to nor one of the girls who knew absolutely that it wasn't for them either. I was always on the fence and when the time for a decision arrived, I struggled greatly and was so overly-concerned that I would choose wrong. At first I decided no, and for a couple months I felt uneasy about it so I went to talk to my bishop and that same night we started my papers. Before I knew it, a month had passed and all my paperwork was done but I still had 3 months until I could actually submit my papers to Salt Lake. The whole time I was still never fully committed but then all of a sudden I had my mission call, I knew where I was going, when I was going, and needed to learn a language. But that piece of paper changed it all for me. My mission was all I could think about, and though terrified as I was, I couldn't wait to get out there and then before I knew it I was in the MTC.
I enjoyed the MTC but the first couple of days was a difficult transition for me. Everyone around me was saying it wasn't hard for them at all (the transition) and in my head I was like, "Are you kidding me?! This is sooo hard!" But as I got accustomed to everything, started understanding some Spanish, I was content and with each passing day couldn't wait to get to New Jersey. But things went south. I don't want to go in to detail on here why I was sent home, so I won't, but the jist is I started getting sick and it just got worse and worse as time went on that leaders were beginning to be concerned.
I was so afraid to be sent home, because I knew, deep down, if I was, I wouldn't return to the mission field, despite how much I would want to, for it wasn't my will to be done. I was informed on Wednesday, September 7, that the MTC Presidency would discuss my case and make a decision about what to do. I found out the next day in the afternoon that I would be sent home and then the following morning I was on the plane to Arizona. It all happened so fast, no way to soften the blow.
I can't explain the hurt, disappointment, and grief that I felt when I came home, especially in those first days. All I wanted to do was cry, and the only thing that would comfort me the slightest was laying my head on my mom's lap with her massaging my head/playing with my hair. I would just cry and she would cry too, but it was comforting. It brought whole new meaning to the counsel, "Mourn with those that mourn." That first day, weekend, week, and month home were the longest of my life. Time still feels slow but It's surprising to see that I've been home now for 8 1/2 months.
It has gotten better, immensely, but it's still hard. I still yearn to be in New Jersey, struggling with Spanish, and a companion, etc. etc. but it would all be worth it. I just know it. I don't cry as much anymore but there still are days when I need my mom's comfort. The hardest thing about it all now is seeing all these people serve missions. I count nearly almost 25 people (friends/acquaintances) that I know personally either on a mission or just about to go, and nearly half of them are girls. I'm incredibly happy for them but every time it's like salt in an open wound. As time goes on, the sting becomes less, but there is no escape from the memory. For the rest of my life, every time the topic of missionary work comes up, when someone receives a call, has a farewell, or homecoming, my mind will revert to my mission and how it was cut short (at least to me, the Lord knew 6 weeks was what I would get). But luckily for me, through Jesus Christ, the sting will not come each time, for my hurt and grief will be swallowed up in the Atonement of Jesus Christ. And that is the best of all :)
Friday, May 18, 2012
Day 5
What are 5 Things that Make you Most Happy Right Now
1. Reading
I love reading. I usually go in spurts but this has been the longest reading streak yet, and my list of books I want to buy and read is just getting longer and longer. Lately I've been reading the most to enhance my gospel understanding. I'm currently reading Jesus the Christ by James E. Talmage and when I'm done with that I'll start reading The House of the Lord by the same author. Reading, especially scriptures and in the morning, just makes my day that much better!
2. Productivity
I love feeling productive. There's nothing much better when at the end of the day I can recount all the stuff I've done that day and it's a long list! It makes me so happy :)
3. The Temple
I love the temple. I didn't really come to appreciate the temple until I was endowed. Before, I never appreciated doing baptisms and confirmations, especially away at school -- it would always be so crowded and rushed, it was hard to sit, relax, and just think. But now, I can't get enough of it. I would go everyday if I could, but for now Tuesday is my temple day and I look forward to it every week!
4. Internet and Netflix
Sounds stupid but I just got an email saying I could get another month of Netflix free if I signed up today. That happened right now :) On another note, our house will officially have internet starting this Tuesday. I can't wait! No longer have to only use my phone or driving to the library or a sibling's house to use their's :)
5. Having a plan
I'm having trouble deciding what to do with my life and what to do for a career, etc. I finally decided to take a stab at the actuarial career path. It's a long, hard, mental road ahead but it's great having a plan. Plans can change, but I have a goal, something to work towards!
1. Reading
I love reading. I usually go in spurts but this has been the longest reading streak yet, and my list of books I want to buy and read is just getting longer and longer. Lately I've been reading the most to enhance my gospel understanding. I'm currently reading Jesus the Christ by James E. Talmage and when I'm done with that I'll start reading The House of the Lord by the same author. Reading, especially scriptures and in the morning, just makes my day that much better!
2. Productivity
I love feeling productive. There's nothing much better when at the end of the day I can recount all the stuff I've done that day and it's a long list! It makes me so happy :)
3. The Temple
I love the temple. I didn't really come to appreciate the temple until I was endowed. Before, I never appreciated doing baptisms and confirmations, especially away at school -- it would always be so crowded and rushed, it was hard to sit, relax, and just think. But now, I can't get enough of it. I would go everyday if I could, but for now Tuesday is my temple day and I look forward to it every week!
4. Internet and Netflix
Sounds stupid but I just got an email saying I could get another month of Netflix free if I signed up today. That happened right now :) On another note, our house will officially have internet starting this Tuesday. I can't wait! No longer have to only use my phone or driving to the library or a sibling's house to use their's :)
5. Having a plan
I'm having trouble deciding what to do with my life and what to do for a career, etc. I finally decided to take a stab at the actuarial career path. It's a long, hard, mental road ahead but it's great having a plan. Plans can change, but I have a goal, something to work towards!
Day 4
List 10 Things You Would Tell Your 16-year-old Self, if You Could.
1. You will get in to BYU, your dream school.
2. BYU isn't as great as they make it out to be and BYUI is not a reject school.
3. Boys are stupid, don't get your hopes up about them.
4. You're right, driving is the best! Hurry up and get your license already.
5. If you do ACE Plus, make sure you go to a state school, otherwise it won't be worth it.
6. One B in high school, won't kill you.
7. Quit avoiding mutual activities.
8. Get out of the house more often.
9. Learn to bridle your tongue.
10. Listen to what I'm saying
1. You will get in to BYU, your dream school.
2. BYU isn't as great as they make it out to be and BYUI is not a reject school.
3. Boys are stupid, don't get your hopes up about them.
4. You're right, driving is the best! Hurry up and get your license already.
5. If you do ACE Plus, make sure you go to a state school, otherwise it won't be worth it.
6. One B in high school, won't kill you.
7. Quit avoiding mutual activities.
8. Get out of the house more often.
9. Learn to bridle your tongue.
10. Listen to what I'm saying
Day 3
Describe Your Relationship With Your Parents.
What a hard question, it's hard to put into words what I feel and what I want to say. But I'll give it my best shot...
My mom is AMAZING. Don't get me wrong, she's CRAZY too but amazing. Her levels of craziness reach all kinds of levels (if you know her personally you know what I mean) but she is perhaps my best friend. I can only recall 3-4 times in my whole life where we clashed, A LOT (and those never lasted more than 4 months). Though at those times, I was sure I hated her and that we would never have a good relationship again, but I'm so glad I was wrong. She has been my rock and support throughout my life. If it weren't for her, I wouldn't have done as well as I did in school, had the courage to go to college (especially move away to go to college), or have the strength to overcome such hard trials. She has set an extraordinary example for me. She has been through such hard times in her own life and yet she still loves the Lord, what a great lesson. I'm so grateful to be hers and for her to be mine. If I'm ever blessed to have children, I hope I can resemble her parenting patterns.
My dad passed away when I was young. I'm told I'm just like him. From pictures, I can definitely see the family resemblence. We both have very analytical, logical, mathematical minds as well. I love hearing stories about him and being told I'm just like him; it makes me happy. He is still very influential in my life. He cared a lot about education and that was a huge motivation for me to do well in high school that I could go on to higher learning. It sounds strange, but I love going to his tombstone by myself at the cemetery he's buried at. I talk to him like he really is there and his spirit gives me strength. I know he helps me from the other side and is proud of me. What a great feeling!
I also have a stepdad, Kevin. He's been around for awhile. He went on his first date with my mom when I was 9 and they got married when I was 15. When they were engaged, I told my mom adamently that he is not my dad and nor will I ever call him that. He's just been Kevin, my mom's boyfriend, fiancee, and husband (depending on the time). For the longest time I never really considered him as anything, not family, not really a friend, but my mom's whatever. It wasn't until recently that it really struck me that he is something to me. He's my stepDAD. He's seen me through the awkward preteens, the horrible teenage years, through elementary, jr. high, high school, college, and a mission. He has definitely supported me through hard times and encouraged me to be better. He has taught me how to grill and helped me gain a love for food. We don't talk a ton, but I know he's there and it's wonderful
What a hard question, it's hard to put into words what I feel and what I want to say. But I'll give it my best shot...
My mom is AMAZING. Don't get me wrong, she's CRAZY too but amazing. Her levels of craziness reach all kinds of levels (if you know her personally you know what I mean) but she is perhaps my best friend. I can only recall 3-4 times in my whole life where we clashed, A LOT (and those never lasted more than 4 months). Though at those times, I was sure I hated her and that we would never have a good relationship again, but I'm so glad I was wrong. She has been my rock and support throughout my life. If it weren't for her, I wouldn't have done as well as I did in school, had the courage to go to college (especially move away to go to college), or have the strength to overcome such hard trials. She has set an extraordinary example for me. She has been through such hard times in her own life and yet she still loves the Lord, what a great lesson. I'm so grateful to be hers and for her to be mine. If I'm ever blessed to have children, I hope I can resemble her parenting patterns.
My dad passed away when I was young. I'm told I'm just like him. From pictures, I can definitely see the family resemblence. We both have very analytical, logical, mathematical minds as well. I love hearing stories about him and being told I'm just like him; it makes me happy. He is still very influential in my life. He cared a lot about education and that was a huge motivation for me to do well in high school that I could go on to higher learning. It sounds strange, but I love going to his tombstone by myself at the cemetery he's buried at. I talk to him like he really is there and his spirit gives me strength. I know he helps me from the other side and is proud of me. What a great feeling!
I also have a stepdad, Kevin. He's been around for awhile. He went on his first date with my mom when I was 9 and they got married when I was 15. When they were engaged, I told my mom adamently that he is not my dad and nor will I ever call him that. He's just been Kevin, my mom's boyfriend, fiancee, and husband (depending on the time). For the longest time I never really considered him as anything, not family, not really a friend, but my mom's whatever. It wasn't until recently that it really struck me that he is something to me. He's my stepDAD. He's seen me through the awkward preteens, the horrible teenage years, through elementary, jr. high, high school, college, and a mission. He has definitely supported me through hard times and encouraged me to be better. He has taught me how to grill and helped me gain a love for food. We don't talk a ton, but I know he's there and it's wonderful
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Day 2
Name and Explain 3 Legitimate Fears:
1. Death
Death is not an uncommon heartache in our family. I'm not so worried about going to "the other side" but more HOW it will happen. A car accident where I wither in pain or a long illness that will ultimately lead to death terrifies me, but in my sleep would be OK. It's more I don't know what to expect, and it's not like someone can explain to you how it will be, and I don't handle the unknown very well.
2. Being Single
I'm getting older. DUHH. To the world, I'm still really young, but in Mormon World, I'm very behind. Most of my friends by now are married, pregnant, or even already have one, with the second on the way. There comes a certain age for girls, when the boys quit looking and focus on the 19-year-olds. I feel like I've passed the threshold or at least VERY CLOSE. I worry that I'll never get married and I'll be alone. The thought of dying alone terrifies me.
3. Failure
I'm so worried about not living up to my potential. I don't like letting myself down, especially letting others down. I worry about making mistakes that are BIG mistakes, making wrong decisions. Obviously wearing white on a rainy day is a bad decision, but not compared to my career, my family, etc. I don't want to mess up nor do I want to misinterpret guidance given to me. Basically, I want to excel. Sure, there will be bumps along the road, but I want to be strong enough, sure enough of myself, to keep going forward.
1. Death
Death is not an uncommon heartache in our family. I'm not so worried about going to "the other side" but more HOW it will happen. A car accident where I wither in pain or a long illness that will ultimately lead to death terrifies me, but in my sleep would be OK. It's more I don't know what to expect, and it's not like someone can explain to you how it will be, and I don't handle the unknown very well.
2. Being Single
I'm getting older. DUHH. To the world, I'm still really young, but in Mormon World, I'm very behind. Most of my friends by now are married, pregnant, or even already have one, with the second on the way. There comes a certain age for girls, when the boys quit looking and focus on the 19-year-olds. I feel like I've passed the threshold or at least VERY CLOSE. I worry that I'll never get married and I'll be alone. The thought of dying alone terrifies me.
3. Failure
I'm so worried about not living up to my potential. I don't like letting myself down, especially letting others down. I worry about making mistakes that are BIG mistakes, making wrong decisions. Obviously wearing white on a rainy day is a bad decision, but not compared to my career, my family, etc. I don't want to mess up nor do I want to misinterpret guidance given to me. Basically, I want to excel. Sure, there will be bumps along the road, but I want to be strong enough, sure enough of myself, to keep going forward.
Stolen Idea: 30 Things
I will openly admit that I stole this idea from my friend Alexa's blog. It's a 30-day/posts learning about me. It will probably take me a lot longer than that but guess what?! My house is jumping into the 21st century and we will have internet starting next week!! So my posts will no longer be so sparatic (ideally that is haha)
Day 1 - 20 Random Facts
1. In a group of people, I'm ALWAYS the shortest person (even compared to the children present usually)
2. I went to 2 out of the 3 BYUs (Provo and Idaho)
3. I LOVE the TV show, FRIENDS.
4. Of the 2 vehicles I've owned, both have been manual and neither have had power locks.
5. I love earrings, especially long silver ones that stand out against my hair.
6. I'm the youngest in my family, and the only single one.
7. I never wanted to live in Arizona again after college and yet, here I live.
8. I was called to serve in the New Jersey Morristown Mission.
9. My brother, Brian, broke my collar bone when I was 3.
10. My brothers, Brian and Scott, and I play INTENSE games of One-for-One.
11. Kickboxing-type workouts have always been my favorite type of exercise (Turbo Jam is the best program!)
12. I work part-time as a math tutor at this facility called Mathnasium (Home of the Power Math Workout! LOL)
13. I have recently started this new rule of One-dessert-a-day; it's hard but very effective!!
14. I HATE the sound of silverware clanking against china (especially spoons against bowls).
15. I have a Bachelor's degree -- my math minor was soooo much more work than my economics minor.
16. For dessert, I love ANYTHING cookie dough.
17. I'm currently studying for the first actuarial exam, hopefully I'll be ready to take it this September.
18. 3 years ago today I was in a rollover car accident. It's a miracle to be alive and I'm so grateful!
19. I've had nearly 40 different roommates (I even have a list!)
20. I saw Hannah Montana: The Movie 10x in the theatres
Day 1 - 20 Random Facts
1. In a group of people, I'm ALWAYS the shortest person (even compared to the children present usually)
2. I went to 2 out of the 3 BYUs (Provo and Idaho)
3. I LOVE the TV show, FRIENDS.
4. Of the 2 vehicles I've owned, both have been manual and neither have had power locks.
5. I love earrings, especially long silver ones that stand out against my hair.
6. I'm the youngest in my family, and the only single one.
7. I never wanted to live in Arizona again after college and yet, here I live.
8. I was called to serve in the New Jersey Morristown Mission.
9. My brother, Brian, broke my collar bone when I was 3.
10. My brothers, Brian and Scott, and I play INTENSE games of One-for-One.
11. Kickboxing-type workouts have always been my favorite type of exercise (Turbo Jam is the best program!)
12. I work part-time as a math tutor at this facility called Mathnasium (Home of the Power Math Workout! LOL)
13. I have recently started this new rule of One-dessert-a-day; it's hard but very effective!!
14. I HATE the sound of silverware clanking against china (especially spoons against bowls).
15. I have a Bachelor's degree -- my math minor was soooo much more work than my economics minor.
16. For dessert, I love ANYTHING cookie dough.
17. I'm currently studying for the first actuarial exam, hopefully I'll be ready to take it this September.
18. 3 years ago today I was in a rollover car accident. It's a miracle to be alive and I'm so grateful!
19. I've had nearly 40 different roommates (I even have a list!)
20. I saw Hannah Montana: The Movie 10x in the theatres
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
I'm still alive, I promise
Hello my friends,
Yikes, it's been over 3 months since my last post... Whoops. I blame the fact that I don't have internet at my house and when I go somewhere where I can update, it's usually the last thing on my mind... But thank you to those who still follow this (if there are any of you left haha)
Well let's see... Since my last post, I had a job, quit said job, and got a new job. I was working in a mail room but quit shortly after (it's a long story, one of which I don't want to get into over the public internet...if you're that curious, ask me and I'll tell you all about it ;) ).
About a week and a half later, I started working at my current place of employment... Mathnasium! My brother, through his many connections, helped me get the interview and I've been working here for 3 months now.
It's a ton of fun and I LOVE it! I work as an instructor/tutor with k-12th grade students. It's pretty evenly spread across the board of ages. The kids test my patience a lot but it's good for me. I'm progressing in work too, being given more responsibilities which is also exciting. The job is only part-time though (the center is not open all day because of school) so I may soon begin looking for another job...either part-time for the morning or a full-time and quit here. I'm not sure yet...Time will tell.
Christmas was good. My brother and his little family came down from Utah for a week and it was nice having the whole family together. It was a little hard Christmas day for me because it's not how I pictured this Christmas. I pictured all my family together still but anxiously awaiting my phone call, not me actually there with them. Other than that, it was good.
New Years was also fun. I'm eager to see what 2012 has in store for me. 2011 was a good, and rough, year but some very memorable things happened in that time... My mom and I went to New York, I went through the temple, I graduated from college, and served a mission. How many people can say that?! :)
I've been enjoying having my mornings and early afternoons off. A typical "day in the life" of me is I wake up, have a breakfast smoothie, read my scriptures, do the laundry, make lunch, do the dishes, work out/exercise, shower, and then head to work. It sounds boring (and sometimes it is) but on the whole it is very fulfilling. I feel like I'm a homemaker in training and I look forward to the "real deal."
I have the wonderful opportunity to go the temple each week and I absolutely look forward to that special time. I live about 35 mins from the Mesa Temple but only about 10 from the Gilbert Temple. Each time I pass it, I'm amazed at the growth in the construction! It's sooo exciting! (I tried posting a picture but it was huge...sorry).
I'm getting better acquainted with my ward. It's taken awhile but it wasn't until about a month ago that I really began trying and the results are amazing. I'm starting to have friends outside of church to hang out with, more acquaintances and familiar faces at church and activities, and even gone out with a couple of boys...don't get any ideas. I'm still NO WHERE close to marriage, but life is picking up and I'm loving it!
Well sorry for the novel with hardly any pictures. I'm at work right now (and don't have my camera) so hopefully next time it will work out.
Random side note: I'm going to see WICKED this Saturday with my mom for the 4th time in 3 years, and I can't wait!
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